Chapter 12: I Could Fall

            Chance sat on the floor beside the couch where Scott lay asleep. She stared out the window as it slowly began to get dark outside. The rain hadn’t let up all afternoon, and tomorrow was going to be another dreary day, but she felt better about it because it was a holiday. She looked up at Scott and smiled. ‘He has such a sweet look on his face,’ she thought. Her hand reached up to stroke his cheek softly. Scott opened his eyes at Chance’s touch and stared at her. Her hand lingered over his lips as he kissed it.

            “You saved my life,” Chance softly whispered.

            “You saved mine,” Scott replied as he kissed her hand again.

            “I’m so sorry,” she apologized.

            “I forgive you,” he answered.

            They stared into each other’s eyes for what seemed like an eternity. Chance could feel her body rise up and bend down to kiss Scott’s waiting lips. She had waited hours for this moment, and it had finally come. It was so wonderful, yet so frightening to know that it would be over soon. She held on to the moment for as long as she possibly could, and when it was over, it lingered in the air.

            “I love you,” Scott said.

            “I love you,” Chance returned. She bent down for another deep, warm kiss.

            “I never want to have another fight like that again,” he replied after the kiss. “I couldn’t bare to do what I did to you today. It hurt me so bad, and I paid for it.”

            “I don’t either. And I promise you, Darren and I are just friends, nothing more,” she reassured him. Chance lay on his chest and kissed his neck

            “I realized that, and I promise I’ll never blow up at you like that again before you can give me an explanation,” he replied. His hand slowly made its way up her back to her still damp black hair.

            Chance looked into his deep brown eyes. It was as if she could see his soul through those eyes. Scott let her probe deeply into places that he had never been before himself. It was all too strange to be exploring feelings that only surfaced when he was this close to someone he loved. Chance’s lips were so close to his that he couldn’t help stealing a kiss from her at that moment.

            For Chance, the tense passion in the air was more than enough to suffocate her. She kissed Scott back with a deep, desire filled kiss she had been saving for the right moment. He kissed back with wanting lips as his own yearnings exploded deep inside. She stood up and began to unbutton her shirt as Scott sat up on the couch.

            “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked.

            “I’ve never been so sure in my life,” Chance responded, her shirt falling to the floor.

~~~~~~~~~~

            Darren sat at the kitchen table still reading his book, which he was close to finishing. The volume on his Discman was turned up all the way up; something he always said would help him concentrate better. He listened to Sarah McLachlan’s “Mirrorball” CD, his favorite one by the artist. As he finished listening to the last track, “Angel,” Darren put down his book and stood up to stretch his legs. He looked over at the clock on the wall to see it was already 11:07 PM.

            ‘Go to sleep,’ his head told him. Darren shook off the tired feeling and went to the fridge to get something to eat. That’s when he heard whispering in the other room. He went to see what was going on or if Chance needed him. Slowly making his way to the door, Darren peaked out into the parlor. He saw Chance on the couch, her face red with exhaustion, and on top of her was Scott, also sweat drenched and exhausted.

            ‘Oh, shit,’ Darren thought at once. He could easily tell what happened just minutes before. Walking back to the kitchen table, he suddenly felt dizzy and light headed. ‘This is too much,’ he told himself. ‘Either you tell her how you feel, or you leave.’

            ‘Any way you look at it, you’re still going to get hurt,’ another voice piped up.

            “Stop it!” Darren said aloud. He couldn’t take the constant bickering of good vs. evil in his mind. It was driving him insane. He thought it was bad before, when he and Colby divorced, but this was bloody murder. The two voices were constantly battling it out, and poor Darren was stuck listening to them, tormented for what he knew would be the rest of his life.

            Darren sat down in his chair and put on his headphones making sure they were full blast to drown out the voices. He closed his eyes and laid his head on his right arm. His head was spinning from all the things he had witnessed in his life. From early childhood, to his days of studying to be a teacher, to his marriage, to Savage Garden, to his divorce, and now to this, he couldn’t take it anymore. He needed help.

            ‘You know, this is entirely your fault. You had to go and fall for her, didn’t you?’ the evil voice popped up again.

            ‘Shut up and leave him alone, you’ve done enough damage for one night,’ the good voice snapped.

            “Will both of you just shut up already?” Darren said aloud. This was taking it to his last threads of sanity. “I’ve had enough of both of you.”

            ‘See what you did this time?’ the evil voice asked.

            ‘Bull shit, this is your fault,’ the good one retaliated.

            Darren had enough. It was time to do something drastic, otherwise the voices would taunt him for the rest of the night. Without thinking how much it would hurt, or how much damage it would cause, he slammed his head on the kitchen table, knocking himself out.

~~~~~~~~~~

            The next morning, Chance woke up with a slight sting in her neck near the cut area. Scott was still asleep, but had fallen to the floor during the night. She laughed to herself then reached down to grab her clothes. After getting dressed, Chance made her way towards the kitchen. Her stomach was growling for breakfast even though it was nearing lunch. Brutus ran from her bedroom to meet her in the parlor.

            “I know you’re hungry. I’ll get you something now,” Chance reassured him. As she stepped into the kitchen, she could see Darren slumped over on his arm appearing to be asleep. She poured Brutus his kibble, and then decided she should wake up Darren to tell him it was lunch. The closer she came, though, the more she noticed that something was very wrong with him.

            “Darren?” Chance cautiously asked. “Darren?” She shook his shoulder, but he wasn’t moving. When Chance turned him over to see why he wasn’t answering, she discovered the blood on the table. She immediately looked at him and saw the bloody gash on his forehead.

            Chance screamed and ran into the parlor to wake Scott up. “Get you’re ass up!” she yelled at him. Scott rolled onto his back and looked up at Chance.

            “Huh?” was the first thing to come out of his mouth.

            “Get up, something happened to Darren,” she frantically said dragging Scott up. He hopped into his pants and followed her.

            Chance ran to the phone and dialed 911 while Scott had time to let everything sink in. After giving the paramedics all the information they needed, she returned to Darren to see if he would wake up on his own. If he didn’t, she knew it was bad.

            “Darren, come on, honey. Wake up, please,” Chance begged and pleaded. She stroked his cheeks hoping to get some life back into him with her touch. “Darren, don’t do this to me. Come on, wake up.” Chance was now on the verge of tears. “Wake up, damn it!” she screamed at him.

            Darren suddenly groaned and began to stir. Chance took his hand and stroked it to encourage him to open his eyes. His hand was ice cold. ‘This must have happened late last night,’ she thought to herself. “Come on, open your eyes,” Chance softly said.

            Darren’s deep blue eyes opened, but looked gray and faded. Chance exploded into tears. Her heart gave a sigh of relief to see those eyes alive. This had been the second time she had come so close to losing someone in the last 24 hours. She composed herself and asked, “What happened? Who did this t you? Was it Brad?”

            Darren looked spaced out and unresponsive, but managed to say, “It’s my fault.”

            “Why would you want to do this to yourself?” Chance replied.

            “The voices were getting too loud,” Darren answered.

            “Voices? What voices?” she asked. Darren was already too far-gone to respond. He began to drift out of consciousness again. “Don’t you dare go to sleep on me,” Chance warned. “I’m going to squeeze your balls like I did Brad’s.”