Chapter 16: A Change Would Do You Good

            Throughout the next week, Chance stayed calm even though she knew Brad was ready to strike again. Scott hadn’t told her much about the plan. He would say that Brad didn’t tell him much about it either. More information was coming in the next meeting, which was scheduled for the same day as Chance’s birthday.

            “This has to be the worst situation that two people can be put in,” Chance said as she and Scott sat on the steps of her back porch the night before.

            “It totally sucks. Tomorrow’s your birthday, and I won’t even be able to spend it with you because I have to be at Brad’s meeting. At least it’s one more day of you being safe from all the shit that’s going down,” Scott said as he leaned into her side. He slipped his arm around her and held her close to him.

            Chance looked up at the stars as she usually did on one of the warmer New York September nights. “I’ll always be safe as long as you’re here with me,” she whispered.

            Scott kissed her cheek and she turned towards him. Her eyes searched his for a long moment then she kissed him back. Memories from that day in the studio came rushing into her head: Darren’s tender kisses, his mesmerizing clear blue eyes, his delightfully soft lips, and his engaging smile. As hard as she tried, Chance could never forget those moments for as long as she lived.

            Chance pulled away abruptly. She didn’t want to believe that she had deceived Scott again. He watched her as she ran her fingers through her long black hair.

            “Is something bothering you?” he asked, his eyes becoming worried.

            “No,” Chance said. ‘I can’t believe I just lied to him,’ she thought.

            “Are you sure? You’ve been really jumpy all week,” Scott replied. “Is it about Brad?”

            Chance waited for a moment to answer. Timing was everything when it came to her game of deception, as much as she hated it. “Yeah,” she finally answered.

            The worry in Scott’s eyes was gone. He leaned in to kiss her again and said, “Don’t worry, I’m here to protect you.”

            Chance smiled and replied, “I know.”

            Darren sat in the kitchen and watched Chance and Scott from a distance. He could hear what they were talking about, and could see that Chance was very uncomfortable with her situation. The painful look of lying to someone shown on her face so clearly to him, and he knew what she was going through. It was all so strangely similar to his own life. He, too, had lied, and knew what potentially devastating effects it had on relationships.

            ‘God, do I miss Colby,’ Darren thought. In an instant, all old feelings left and were replaced with hostile hatred. ‘Stop living in the past. That was both our faults. She had as much to do with the divorce as I did.’ He didn’t dare to think about the subject any longer. His gaze turned back to the lovebirds on the back porch.

            ‘Chance and Scott look so happy together.’ A smile creased over Darren’s face as he watched them from him vantage point kissing and professing their love for each other. Memories rushed into his head of the way he and Colby used to be. Anger once again filled his heart. Another flash appeared in his mind. This one was about the day he found out Colby had been cheating on him, and the day she found out Darren had been with more than one person himself.

            ‘That’s it, I’ve had enough of this,’ Darren though. Luckily for him, the phone rang, preventing those little voices from coming back to haunt him. He shot up to answer it.

            “Hello?” he asked.

            “Hey, Daz. We’re here,” Dan’s tired voice said over the phone.

            “Great. There should be a limo waiting for you outside. I already gave the driver instructions on which hotel to take you,” Darren told him.

            “Good, Charles is tired, Walter is ready to fall asleep, Rebecca is ready to go mad after hearing me rant about Chance, Larry’s bored out of his mind, and I’m ready to drop dead on my feet. This had to be the worst flight I’ve ever been on. It was bumpy, it was boring, and all the movies sucked,” Dan complained. “But there was an up side to the 24 hour trip.”

            “Oh, an up side?” Darren asked.

            “Yeah.” Dan paused for a moment. “I met this really pretty girl who was sitting in front of me. She had such beautiful sky blue eyes and long blond hair. I swear she looked like an angel.”

            “Name?”

            “Alexia.” The sound of Dan’s voice changed when he said her name. He sounded distant, almost as if he were in a dream world.

            Darren sensed that his friend was lost in the realm between love and infatuation. All he could do was sit back and watch Dan lose himself wherever he was.

            “Well, I’d better let you get to the hotel. Call me tomorrow morning and I’ll give you the rest of the information about the party.”

            “Okay.” Dan yawned. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow then. Bye.”

            “Bye.” Darren hung up and placed the phone back on the stand. He stood beside it, his shoulder resting on the wall, and watched the moon as it flooded beams of light into the kitchen through the open door and windows. The party he had referred to was the one he was throwing for Chance’s 18^th birthday as a surprise. He had invited Charles to bring whoever was interested in hearing Chance after finding out that he had been working to get her a deal with Sony’s Columbia Records.

            Walter Afanasieff was the co producer of “Affirmation,” and had heard Chance’s voice after Dan had convinced him to listen to the demo he recorded in New York with her. Walter sent the demo to Rebecca Mostow, Savage Garden’s manager, who sent it to Larry Tollin, head of Larry Tollin Entertainment. All three were very impressed and wanted to hear more. This had given Darren the idea to throw Chance the party and introduce her to people who could possibly offer her the deal of a lifetime.

            Weeks of careful planning and long aggravating hours on the phone with managers, producers, and everyone in between, Dan and Darren had been able to get the three important people out of meetings and onto planes headed for New York. Having pulled off the hardest work first, it was up to Darren to find the perfect restaurant to hold the party at. He had chosen a posh uptown Italian place called the Primavera.

            It had the perfect setting to hold a small party and house band. The downside: it was too romantic for Darren to stand. The only reason he had reserved Primavera that night was for Chance and Scott to enjoy themselves. Unfortunately Scott couldn’t make it because he had to go to an important meeting, which he explained might cost Chance her life if he didn’t go. Darren understood. He didn’t mind the fact that he would now be able to spend some quality time with Chance.

            As Darren looked off into space thinking about last minute things for the party, Chance and Scott walked back into the kitchen from the porch. Chance noticed the distant look in Darren’s eyes and waved her hand in his face.

            “Earth to Darren. Where are you?” she asked.

            Darren snapped out of his daze and looked at Chance blankly. “What?” he asked.

            A smile appeared on her face. “You can be so weird,” Chance said, then walked towards the door with Scott’s arm around her waist. She led him to the front door and leaned in for a kiss.

            “I guess I’ll see you later,” Scott said, holding Chance close to his body as if he’d never be able to share this kind of moment with her ever again.

            “Bye,” she softly replied, kissing him once more on the lips.

            “Bye,” he answered back, opening the door and letting himself out. Chance watched him pull out of her driveway in the darkness. She lingered at the door for a while longer, watching the car head out of her driveway and onto the road. She then closed it and headed for her room upstairs.

            “Where are you going?” Darren called from the kitchen.

            “To bed,” Chance answered as she ascended the stairs, one foot slowly pulling up the other in a leisurely pace.

            “Before you do, I was going to ask you, could I take you out tomorrow?” he questioned, trotting to the stairs.

            “Yeah, sure. Why not? It’s not like my day is full anyway,” she said, sounding more than annoyed.

            “You sound a little angry,” Darren acknowledged. He could feel her tension radiate throughout the room.

            “Really?” Chance replied sarcastically. “Of course I’m angry. Not just a little, I’m pissed to no end! I can’t believe I sat there with Scott and lied to him about everything. I can’t take it anymore! I have to tell him about what happened in the studio. If I don’t, it’s going to drive me to the point of insanity.”

            “I’m sorry I couldn’t help myself. Besides, we are both guilty. Why didn’t you push me away if you knew what the consequences would be? It’s your fault as much as it’s mine, so stop blaming me for everything,” he shouted back at her.

            “God! You are impossible to argue with,” she hollered, stammering up the stairs in a fit.

            “I know why; because I bring up things you don’t want to talk about, like your problems. You can’t face them by yourself, and you need a scapegoat for all the things that you’ve been through. That’s why you hide and can’t argue.” Darren’s harsh words struck a cord deep within Chance. She ran into her room and slammed the door with all the force she could muster. Jumping into bed, she buried her face into her pillow, softly crying into it for comfort.

            Darren stood at the foot of the staircase still staring up at where Chance had escaped. He knew his words were cruel, and he wasn’t ready to take them back. They had built up from all the observations he had made while watching Chance as she went on with her life. There had been so many avoided confrontations; he knew his theory was right. He began to walk up the stairs to his room, waiting a few moments at each step to think about what had happened.

            Slowly, Darren made his way past Chance’s room. He stopped there in front of the door and waited a little while to see if he could hear anything coming from within. Low, heartache filled sobs could be heard inside, and he knew he had hurt her yet again. He contemplated going in and apologizing, but decided not to. Just as he was about to walk away, the door opened and Chance peered out to see him.

            She cleared her throat and said, “I came to the conclusion that you were right. I do hide from my problems and use a scapegoat to get out of them. I’m sorry you had to be the one on that end.”

            Darren smiled and replied, “I forgive you.” He reached up and wiped a few tears that dripped down her cheeks.

            “Good night,” Chance said. She disappeared behind her door again, and Darren was left alone in the hall. He headed to his room and shut the door behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~

            The next morning, Chance and Darren found themselves exploring New York City. Chance kept her mouth shut most of the time not wanting to say anything about the night before, or about anything else. She didn’t even want to acknowledge the fact that today was her birthday. So deep in thought, she almost didn’t hear Darren as he spoke to her.

            “So, what do you want me to get you of your birthday?” he asked.

            “You still haven’t gotten me anything?” Chance answered in surprise. She didn’t want to make it known that she didn’t care much for today.

            “Well, I don’t know what you want. How do you expect me to get you something special if I have no idea what you like?” They aimlessly walked down the streets of New York looking through the little shop windows.

            “To tell you the truth, I don’t really know what I want. I guess you’ll have to come up with something on your own,” she replied. Her eyes spotted a little tattoo parlor on the other side of the street.

            Darren followed her gaze and said, “I think I got it.”

            “What?” Chance asked. She didn’t know what he was talking about.

            “Come on. I got the prefect gift.” Darren took her hand and led her across the street to the tattoo parlor.

            “Oh, my God! You’re crazy!” she yelled, laughing at his idea. “I couldn’t possibly get a tattoo.”

            “Haven’t you ever wanted to do something crazy?”

            “Yeah, but…”

            “Well, this is your opportunity to. Come on,” Darren tried to convince her.

            Chance waited a while before answering. She wanted to think about what she was getting herself into. After a few minutes of debating, she finally said, “Oh, alright.”

            A giant, goofy grin appeared on Darren’s face as he led her into the shop. There was a fat old biker sitting in one of the shop chairs reading a magazine. He heard Chance and Darren walk in and stood up, placing the magazine on an old, dilapidated coffee table near his seat.

            “What can I do for you?” he asked in a gruff voice as he reached the front counter. Behind him were the pictures of nearly a thousand tattoos. Chance looked at them to see what she liked as Darren did the talking.

            “My friend here wants to get a tattoo for her birthday,” he said, pointing to Chance.

            “Well, everything on the wall, I’ve done,” the old man bragged. “Is there anything in particular that you want done?”

            Chance stared at the wall unable to find anything to her liking. “I don’t really know,” she told him. “I’m still looking for something that’ll get attention and at the same time have some significance.”

            “The first thing you need to figure out is where you want the tattoo,” the man said.

            “That would probably be a good place to start,” Chance replied. She made a mental list of places she thought were good for a tattoo. After debating in her head for a while, she turned to Darren and asked, “Ankle of back?”

            “From my point of view, if you had it on your ankle, you’d always be covering it with a pair of socks. If it were on your back, you’d never be able to cover it with the shirts you have. I’d go for your back just because I think it’s very sexy,” Darren suggested.

            Chance smiled. Darren always knew what to say to her, and she like it. “Okay, it’s going on my back,” she told the man behind the desk and then began searching again for the perfect tattoo.

            Her eyes skimmed across the boards looking, hoping to find the one that would completely fit her. As her eyes reached the final board, they settled on a beautiful butterfly, its black, red, and yellow wings outstretched to a length that looked like it could just fit between her shoulder blades.

            “That’s it,” she said, pointing to it.

            Darren looked in disbelief. He wasn’t sure why she would pick something so dark. He had always pictured her as being someone with a taste for something colorful. “Explain to me why you’re choosing that one, please,” he replied.

            “The butterfly symbolizes my transformation into the adult world. The colors represent different things. The black represents the period of darkness in my life after my parents died. The yellow represents the sunlight that has been cast into that darkness after you and Dan came into my life and completely changed it for the better. The red, of course, represents the love I have for the people who have made my life worth living, especially you and Scott. That’s why I chose it,” Chance explained.