“Call in the next band,” Dan said as e rubbed his eyes open. He had heard ten different acts that day ranging from teen pop to old bluegrass, and frankly, he was getting sick of listening.
Jack could see the fatigue all over his body and replied, “I really think you should continue this later. You need some rest.”
“No, I can do it, don’t worry. Just bring in the next band,” he replied.
“Dan, you look like you’re going to pass out. Stop right now or I’m going to stop it for you,” she angrily retorted.
“Okay,” Dan replied without protest. Jack left the room and came back a few minutes later with a cup of coffee. “What’s that for?” he asked.
“Maybe it’ll help you calm down and get some sleep. You’ve been up all night working. What have you been doing?”
“Writing some new music.”
“You’re always writing new music. Don’t you know you have all the time in the world to do that? Take a time out. Why don’t we head to the beach for a few hours and get some well deserved rest?”
“Alright.”
As Dan and Jack left the house, Darren was slowly waking up from his drug therapy. He stared at the ceiling waiting for the room to stop spinning before he got up and walked downstairs to the kitchen. He rummaged through the cabinets searching for something to feed his grumbling stomach. As he went through the last few drawers, he stumbled upon Jack’s old pain medications. Smiling to himself, Darren put the pills into his pocket and headed back upstairs. He walked down the hall to the bathroom. Looking into the mirror for the first time in nearly a month, he saw his reflection.
Darren almost jumped back when he saw his face. He had pale, almost pasty white skin and his eyes had turned from sapphire blue to almost ash gray. His body had completely changed. He felt 20 pounds lighter, but was actually 30. Where lean muscle used to be, his bones now stuck out through his skin.
“What happened to me?” Darren asked himself in a shaky voice. He walked out of the bathroom, and as he passed Jack’s room, he stopped. The door was open, but she wasn’t inside. Darren tip toed in and stood beside the unmade bed. His fingertips brushed up against the purple velvet sheets as he closed his eyes and remembered the last time they were together. He missed Jack more than he had ever missed anyone.
Darren continued to walk around her room and sat down at the desk in the corner. A piece of blank paper lay on top with a pen beside it. He scribbled down a quick note, looked at it, then decided to write some more. Finishing ten minutes later, he folded it and kept it in his hand as he took the pills out of his pocket and poured them into his hand. Slowly swallowing each one without water, Darren sat down on the bed and waited for the drug to take effect. As he looked over at the nightstand, he found Jack’s picture in a frame. Picking it up, he stared at her happy expression until he fell back unconsciously.
~~~~~~~~~~
Jack was lying on the beach on top of her brightly colored blanket watching the waves roll in. Dan was asleep beside her and Nadia was wading around in the shallow water. Jack couldn’t help but laugh every time she saw her turn around and her large belly would pop out of her bathing suit.
“Come over here!” Nadia called to her. Jack stood up and walked to the water’s edge. It was becoming much easier for her to stop thinking about the old days when she used to surf here. Her mind immediately switched off those memories when the water rolled onto her feet. Jack smiled as she looked over at Nadia. “And I thought California had the best beaches.”
“Isn’t Australia so much more beautiful?” Jack replied.
“Yeah, I love it. Every day I thank God that I’m here with you, Dan, and Darren,” Nadia said.
Jack looked away when she heard Darren’s name. She could still remember the day she shut him out of her life. She also remembered how she felt after Nadia told her about how crushed Darren had been. Jack couldn’t help but feel bad for what she had done; then again, it had been the only way to keep him away when she didn’t want him to be around. As she wondered how she could get herself out of this mess, a chill went up her spine, and not the kind that was carried by the wind. It was one of those chills that she felt when she knew something bad was going to happen.
“Come on, let’s go home,” Jack said as she walked back over to where Dan was still asleep. She rummaged through her bag to find her clothes, and soon after pulling them on she woke him. “Come on, Danny. Let’s go. It’s about to get dark and I’m tired.” She didn’t want to tell him about her feeling in fear of scaring him like the last time she told him something bad was going to happen. It had been the day before her father was killed in the car accident. She had also scared herself that day because she knew it would happen, but where and when was a different story.
They arrived at the house just before the sun set. Jack rushed into the kitchen to call her mother to make sure she was okay. With her heart a little more at ease, she ascended the stairs and went to her room. Looking inside before she entered, she saw Darren laying face down on her bed.
“Darren, what are you doing in here?” she cautiously asked. He didn’t answer. “Darren, wake up and get out of my room,” Jack said a little louder and with a more irritated tone. She went over to shake his shoulder. “Darren!” she yelled. With her anger building up, she finally pushed him over. She gasped when she realized why he wasn’t talking. His lips were almost pale blue and his skin was the color of paper. Her heart began racing.
“Darren wake up!” Jack frantically shouted as she patted his cheek with her hand. She desperately felt his neck for a pulse but couldn’t find one. “Oh, God!” she cried. “Danny!” Tears filled up in her eyes when it finally hit her that Darren might be dead. “NO!” she shrieked.
Dan heard Jack’s scream all the way from the studio. He shot up the back staircase to see what was wrong. He discovered her in her bedroom gently cradling Darren’s head in her arm as she cried. Dan stepped closer and saw that he was paler than pale.
“He’s dead!” Jack yelled.
Dan ran out of the room and went into Nadia’s. She was standing by the mirror, her hair wet and a towel around her body. He dragged her away and took her into Jack’s room. “What’s going on?” she asked before entering. Dan pushed her inside and she saw what had happened. Jack was bawling above Darren’s limp, lifeless body.
Nadia immediately went over and grabbed his arm to make sure he still had some kind of pulse. At first, she couldn’t find one, but after desperately looking again, she finally felt a weak one. She turned to Dan and said, “Call an ambulance.” Turning to Jack, she added, “Get a hold of yourself.”
“Don’t let him die. Please, don’t let him die,” Jack begged.
“I’m not about to,” Nadia retorted. Listening to his chest, she realized he wasn’t breathing. “Aw, fuck!”
“What?” Jack screeched.
“I need your help. You need to give him CPR because, frankly, it’s a risk to my health if I even try.”
“But I don’t know what to do!”
“You’ve seen ER, right? Well, basically, it’s the same thing.”
Jack, with fear and uncertainty running through her head, did exactly what Nadia told her. Dan arrived a few minutes later. Two men dressed in uniforms followed him and took Darren away in a stretched. Dan, Jack, and Nadia silently stood in the room wondering what would happen next. Jack’s gaze was unable to focus on anything and darted around the room until she laid eyes on her bed. A small, crumpled piece of paper lay atop the purple velvet along with an empty orange pill bottle. She picked them both up and read the pill bottle label.
“Those were my pills,” she whispered. Looking down at the note in her hand, Jack realized what it was. Slowly, she unfolded it and began reading.
Jack,
Dan, Nadia, Leonie, and everyone else,
I’m
sorry for being that nagging pain in your side. I’m sorry for all the stupid
things I’ve done. I’m sorry for even being born. I didn’t meant to cause anyone
trouble, especially you, Jack. I’m sorry to have put you through so much pain.
If I had known it would lead to this, I never would have done it. Losing you
proved to be my downfall. I wish I had enough time to tell you that I loved
you, but I guess this’ll have to do. In the words of Tim McGraw, “Remember
me when you're out walking. When snow falls high outside your door. Late at
night when you're not sleeping, and moonlight falls across your floor... And
I can't hurt you anymore. You'll find better love, strong as it ever was, deep
as the river runs, warm as the morning sun, but please, remember me.” Good-bye,
everyone. I love you all, and hopefully we’ll meet again someday.
Darren
Jack was in tears after she read the suicide note. Passing it to Dan and Nadia, she turned away and began to shudder as she cried. By the time they finished, everyone was weeping. Dan held Jack tightly in his arms as she grieved on his shoulder. They rocked back and forth as his own sorrow spilled out. Darren had been his best friend for the last six years and now, all of a sudden, he was gone.
“This is all because of me,” Jack cried. “He killed himself because I pushed him away.”
“Sh…” Dan whispered as he patted her back. “He’s not dead.”
“Yes, he is!” she screamed. “And it’s all my fault!”
“Calm down,” he said in a soothing tone. “We should get to the hospital. We’ll find out more there.”