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Faith
Break
“I can’t believe I just did that. I must be crazy, telling Darren that I
want to get married before I die. Jeez, I sound so selfish. What was I thinking
when I told him? I guess I wasn’t thinking at all. I must be the dumbest
person in the whole world. I know he’s gonna get the wrong idea from this, and
that’s the last thing I want. I don’t want him proposing to me just because
of some stupid wish. If anything, I’d want him to propose to me because he
still loves me, which, unfortunately, he does. I don’t want him getting too
hurt when I die. He’s already coping with the fact that he’s got a child to
take care of. I don’t need him worrying about me too. I know he is, though.
“What am I supposed to do? Tell him I was kidding? Well, that sounds like a
good idea, but there’s no way I could do something so cruel. Maybe I should
tell him to forget I even said that.
“Okay, Faith, take a break and just listen to yourself. You really sound like
you’re going crazy.
“I know I am! All I wanna do is tell Darren the truth. I still have deep
feelings for him. I still shudder every time he touches me. I still go crazy
over all the little things he does for me. It’s not fair! Why can’t I have
just a little more time than what the doctors are saying? This is all I ever
wanted. This is all I ever dreamed about. I wanna get married to him. I wanna
see myself walking down the aisle in a white dress with my friends and family
all watching me. Why? Why can’t I have my life extended just a tad bit more so
I can at least have my wedding and die happy? It’s not fair!”
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